Amazing poetry blog . http://www.genocideoftheheart.wordpress.com
Just hate that feeling I get when I get dressed and I see that my tummy or backside is sticking out and nt in nice way . Like me for example I wear size 6 tops but my botom half is usualy size or 2 biger. It seems small but u know its allways how u as person feel . And I never felt proud of my body top half good to go bottom dear god no . So now as uni is starting ill be more bussy so won’t be able concentrate on food as much. I gona really start geting my self in the shape I want so I feel comfortable in it . In some way I always admired people who feel really good in their skin no matter what size or shape they are and I think that’s wht makes a person beautiful .cos if u feel good about ur self u get further cos u have 1 less thing on ur mind to worry about . Hate the fact that u go down the street or something and people say u look nice etc etc etc u say tnx but in heart u feel like ur just a big blob rolling down the street . So I thought with start of uni I gona try make it better and at least work out at evenings do them 100 sit ups and crunches for the better life we forgot about
That time month again .. For hair dyeing . Let’s face it its much better when some1 else can do it specialy when u have a mohawk as last time I did strugle dying it my self so it doesn’t get all over the sides as I try leave them undyed so when they shawed they look lot lighter and gives the contrast I want as I dnt dye it different color. So just to get it shaved on tuesday and be all pretty again
Recently been talking to this person about the goth scene in the kids now and that. Its lots more different than it was when I started going into it all . Aperently me in my 20 years count as old goth already as I clearly never grew out of it lol but it seems like now every1 who is goth and does not hate the world ur not goth lol just makes me laugh and these 12 15 year old kids take it all super serious that u need hate and rebel to absolutely everything you see other ways u are not goth its like in my eyes they don’t actualy see the joys of it . I have always been pretty positive and still goth to this day that’s y maybe its kind of idiotic in my mind . When was going to school and every1 had these ideas I never was really accepted by got comunity because I did staid positive about literary everything cos I think there is good in everything but my fellow goth kids were pretty hatefull and I felt that its to limited thinking. I feel people should be more open minded specialy if ur kind of alternative cos most people view u as a weirdo but that’s their prob nt urs prob that’s y feel like I hav never been bullied as I never cared enough its ur mind and lol I’m happy u have one so shut up and stop being so hatefull
Its time . Its the sad time . I need go to dentists cos my tooth is hurting well ok 2 teeth are hurting and I can already feel gap in my bank acount I just home its just minor fixing cos it not like hurts but like I hav feel like the previous fillings are moving like I can feel it when I walk lol its weird . Like really weird lol does anyone ever get that kind feel? Or I’m now this damaged lol member the good old days when was little my dentist used say that have such great teeth and now 10 year later its dead lol all cos I imbraced fizzy and sugary drinks I can’t live with out that stuff I do brush my teeth atleast 2 times a day etc etc but clearly it can’t kill the sugary goodnes that’s going against it so ill start uni with an dentist apointment lol lucky me
as one evening was kind of bored and try out some make up will post up some pics of how it turned out in next post but this is how it happened kind of
Ever looked in mirror and thought damn what happened I was so skinny yestrday? That’s literary only way how to explain how I feel about my look today. Just feels that after yestrdays non stop eating I have gained a stone. When I step on scale there is no change but it doesn’t mean it makes me feel any better of my tummy lol in some sence it seems crazy to me cos I put a size 6 shirt on and it fits ok just dunno . Since my lovely best friend sent me a pic of me in beach wearing shorts and bikini top I felt horrofied . And thinking my 30 day jumping challenge is totally not working. Yes I’m still doing it . Mybe I should do sit up or something instead . To work on erm effected areas more . Cos with my super low blood pressure heavy diets are nt my friend so litterary duno. Just will need come up with something that actualy makes a difference .
So finaly sold some my stuff online clearing a big corner . So get some free room for things and stuff . I always try to sell my stuff on as like close ways now lots things are too big for me but still good to wear I just sell them on . As I can get bit pocket money and some1 can actualy get it cheeper and make more use of the things than I would . I always specialy for clothes put a super low price cos it is pure and simple to get them out my house but god the post is killing it its crazy like for tiny shirt that I sell for 50p some poor buyer have to pay almost 3 pound for post its crazy duno y post is killing it so much noone gona use it no more . But like say ebay is great to just pass on ur things cos lot times ill buy used things there cos they cheeper but maybe just not in box or something so in some way feel like give something back . 🙂 . Still like mega pile of mags to list like elle and how it works and national geographic and some random bizzares and stuff . So yeah if u want cheep random stuff be sure to find my page 😉 haha wink wink . @ babybat7896
So finaly in bed feels like such long day today.w as my mums name day and as latvians we celabrate name days and her name is sandra so today was her name day . Just thought share me of the day lol but god we been eating all day non stop feels like its killing me lol even now I’m just lying here stuffing my face with salad thing lol ill post recepie for it tomarrow. But do feel better as cold start to wear off but feel bit yuck but I’m getting there tomarrow back to work too then this mancester thing prob blog tru it .