i want to be skinny again

This is it yesterday it struck me heavily . I’m fat again. I hate it . Cos work I dnt have time to work out at day time and at evening I’m usually too tired to be bothered to do anything yet it does not stop me eating like a little piggy . So I think its time to take action. I gona cut down munch for everything I eat ill do 10 squats like did in good old days . And need come up with routine that can actually work for evening time rather than just skipping it . Like kate moss said nothing tastes as good as skinny feels . Could not agree with that more. So I think its time for action . Finaly .

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thoughts on weight and stuff

so must say it have recently struck me down bad time. i have a winter tire and im really not happy about it.  i noticed even when was in scotland at my boyfriends i felt really shy about it and if i had just like my bra on or a short top and i had to sit down i put my arms around my self to kind cover my belly.  and i honestly avoid mirrors.  i have a large mirror in my closet and if i have change clothes or something my back is always turned to it.  i feel ok if everythings covered but if need show skin then its like nooo…  just feels like some weird mental thing or something.  but i dnt know just gona try work out every moment i get and cut down on crazy much and portion sizes.  cos i felt so good last summer where now i litterary feel like a fatass.  and im not ok with it and something need be done.  so today gona mesure everything and see what needs improvements the most and then just work out. all the time. specialy now when the uni is practicaly done, 

so heres a pic of me.  no shame. but wearing my new top from h&m. got it yesterday well pleased.

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finaly back to work outs

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so its official im in day number 3 of nor,al work out range every day.  so get that fat off and them muscles back cause i want to wear some shorts and i dont want my legs wigling about.  not this year.  thos year is the year for change and good stuff.  so fuck fat lets do this. but must say as alwats as increase the work out load my tummy been grumbling nom stop too so need be aware that i dont stuff, y face with cakes.  ok maybe a tiny bit cake just to say hey i can aford to eat cake lol look at my flat tummy lol one day. hopefully soon. 

f it im blasting out the sauna belt

Ok yesterday I setped on the scale again and believe me I was not happy. I wanted to cry a little and yes I went and had a cokie cos I felt sad wich made it all even worse . But I’m taking action. I’m blasting out sauna belt. It have always been big help for me to feting back to good shape. And I’m wearing it all day today . As am working on my room moving about non stop too . So gets me sweating bit more . Did my everyday work out too . So feel pretty pleased . Sugested work out music ? Bloodhund gang lol no joke . So I’m trying to dance abot just them couple extra movements always helps. I will not lose out on good shapes this sumer . Must do even better than last year ! Feel pleased at moment must say 🙂

my breakfast and my lunch

So it is officialy my first day of trying get back in shape . And must say doing good so far . As I did not buy any munch as I always would have done . Instead I got a large hot chocolate . Wich totaly filled me and cos its so sugary It gives me energy too . Yes I call this breakfast and lunch. In some sense feel that no bread rule gona be bit hard as that’s that kind thing I usualy get for lunch if I’m out and about. So at moment not to sure how I gona go about it . But as this my last day of uni and I’m going on spring brake means I won’t be eating lunches outside as much as for start need save money cos going scotland and 2nd no bread lol . I did got pack of halls just in case I want a sweety . As it would keep my mouth bussy without eating a freaking elephant of sandwiches lol

ok im fat

ok it have came to my attention.  well it happened last night that i have gained like 2kg. .. im not happy at all.  i need get back in shape i mean what happened.  i had such good mesurments last summer. and i am determined to get back to it.  no mather what it takes. it gona be hard but ill do it.  so i thought i need organise and start things new and fresh.  besides the bloging challenge ill be strating 2 more challenges.  1st being 30 days without bread that includes wraps all the pastries and that kind good stuff to.  which i think will get me losing weight instantly cos i love dougnuts and them chocolate bunthings and all that kind stuff.  im giving it all up.  plus my insides be happier too as wel my tummy does not like too much bread.  and second challenge i gona restart my bum challenge as i been doing it but the days have been skiped etc etc but now im ready for it.  good body here i come

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what happened with the work outs?

Dnt u ever get feel that u have worked out too much and kind think hmm ill have couple days to reast and the find ur self given up and stuffing mc donalds down ur troat wile thinking that? Lol I sure do. Its just sometimes I feel like I need a bad dream to relise that yeah need get back to it and instead of picking up a snack pack of sweets but say apple or banana instead . Always seems so hard to just have a rest and then get back into it cos its just not happenibg . Nt too pleased of my self :/

feeling chubby..

Just hate that feeling I get when I get dressed and I see that my tummy or backside is sticking out and nt in nice way . Like me for example I wear size 6 tops but my botom half is usualy size or 2 biger. It seems small but u know its allways how u as person feel . And I never felt proud of my body top half good to go bottom dear god no . So now as uni is starting ill be more bussy so won’t be able concentrate on food as much. I gona really start geting my self in the shape I want so I feel comfortable in it . In some way I always admired people who feel really good in their skin no matter what size or shape they are and I think that’s wht makes a person beautiful .cos if u feel good about ur self u get further cos u have 1 less thing on ur mind to worry about . Hate the fact that u go down the street or something and people say u look nice etc etc etc u say tnx but in heart u feel like ur just a big blob rolling down the street . So I thought with start of uni I gona try make it better and at least work out at evenings do them 100 sit ups and crunches for the better life we forgot about

im not fat im big boned

Ever looked in mirror and thought damn what happened I was so skinny yestrday? That’s literary only way how to explain how I feel about my look today. Just feels that after yestrdays non stop eating I have gained a stone. When I step on scale there is no change but it doesn’t mean it makes me feel any better of my tummy lol in some sence it seems crazy to me cos I put a size 6 shirt on and it fits ok just dunno . Since my lovely best friend sent me a pic of me in beach wearing shorts and bikini top I felt horrofied . And thinking my 30 day jumping challenge is totally not working. Yes I’m still doing it . Mybe I should do sit up or something instead . To work on erm effected areas more . Cos with my super low blood pressure heavy diets are nt my friend so litterary duno. Just will need come up with something that actualy makes a difference .