reality

past couple days been thinking about the internet and the realization of people with in it. basically like a  week ago me and my boyfriend was shopping around charity shops as we were looking about this girl approached me and said she watches my video etc and obvious me totally failing got supper shy etc and all i could do is blush and say thanks. the more i thought about this the more it kind of makes me realize the 5000 people flowing me on youtube are actual people lol its like suddenly they have a face it’s no more just a number on my screen. i just dont know. its like my brain have had sudden realization there is people there not just me rumbling about nothing . must say it was great feeling to be a somebody for 2 seconds.

just wanted say hi

Hey guys . How are you? Just wanted post a quick blog just to let you know I’m still alive and still fighting. Tomarrow big day . Going london sort my passport as it ends in couple days . And tbh feels like it comes in good time . Considering the start of the week I could do with some picking up . Plus its been almost half a year since been to london so be nice just to walk about etc . Wana go to a museum too or atleast a gallery or something so gona be good day . Really looking forward to it.

just 1 of them days

My official 1st day back to normal life. Feel tired and unhappy and need go to uni and preferably not kill anyone . Just feel so sad going away from my boyfriends and come back to notts. Always feels like escape from normality with actualy something nice and happy for change. And then the big return like today brain just refuse to function. Feels like walking around in autopilot. Not happy not happy at all..

just over a 100

Unbelievable have happened and I have reached over 100 subscribers on my random youtube channel. Feel loved . Lol never actually thought I could get 1 person to even view a video there never mind subscribe . Do appreciate it and hopefully for another hundred to go . Woop . If u haven’t seen it . U should . http://www.youtube.com/user/darkprincess7896 or just search disspossable and some bits should technically come up.

not ill just bit gray looking..

Do I look dead? Well a littlebit . Lol my heads banging and feel like all day have run past wile I just well sit here lol . Gona try put some pics on my wall and try sort my bed as want some cleen covers and want just ly there lol but I’m not going down this easy

cant just lie there in sun all day

Let’s face it when u see ur cat just lie there in the sun on floor u just want say f this and lie there next to him. But need get up and make a plan for the day. As feel like I have done absolute notting for past weeks as just waiting for the uni to start at end of september . So gona make a plane to make my day usefull maybe start with power nap.. Ok no powernap lol. But I always nEed. A plan for litterary everything I think its the way forward for more active days etc so my plan once again is to make a plan.

So closet finaly be cleared and cleaned from top to bottom oneday wall back in place to get me motivated again. So despite being super clumsy today lol sud seen me take on the little bit of carpet that’s in my closet lol hit my self in face and everything . I feel really good and positive and like notting can stop me . 🙂 woop woop 🙂 . Looks so nice makeing me feel nice def good start for that better life 🙂 x

just another wait

Just oFf work after my first night alone nt to bad taking train and stuff kind makes it mor exiting lol yeah I dnt need lots to get exited . The joy