reality

past couple days been thinking about the internet and the realization of people with in it. basically like a  week ago me and my boyfriend was shopping around charity shops as we were looking about this girl approached me and said she watches my video etc and obvious me totally failing got supper shy etc and all i could do is blush and say thanks. the more i thought about this the more it kind of makes me realize the 5000 people flowing me on youtube are actual people lol its like suddenly they have a face it’s no more just a number on my screen. i just dont know. its like my brain have had sudden realization there is people there not just me rumbling about nothing . must say it was great feeling to be a somebody for 2 seconds.

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its official

Its official. My second day in job . Yes I’m being a working woman with house husband lol. Nt minding life like this . Easy job, great man at home . That’s the way to the real person world. Only need leave house at 5 o’clock . So is bit early but means I get home quicker . I know its notting amazing job ways . But like I always say . Job is a job. And if one needs money one needs to work . So honestly feel like life going the right direction for a change . Happy

just a freaky day ..

been such long day and its only what half past 3 in day . just keeps draging on . i think its the mega storms fault. just all the trains stuff and what else not. so im happily at home trying to look like im actualy doing something not just sitting about looking at idiotic picture like the crazy cat lady lol but i saw like the cutest owl video tho lol. but gues some work finally need be done as it is handing in next week so put sponge bob on and will take on finnishing stuff off .

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30 day random blog challenge day 7 : thing you like and dont like about the way you look

in some sense this is kind obvious . the thing i dont like is that i feel chubby and i really need work on my legs . which i finally have started doing . i feel that the model look is amazing and i dnt think that its not achievable obvious would take time etc but y not . obvious i dnt mean kind skin and bones look but flat tummy small boobies little bum cheeks slim legs and yes the gap lol i would kill for the gap lol . i dnt want say yeah we should love our self the way we are blah blah blah . if you dnt like something about our selves we should do something about it for our selves. ok the thing i do like about the way i look is my style choice i love being goth it brightens up my day . 🙂

 

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new 30 day random blog challenge. +day 1

as thought the previous 30 day challenge was great at end it did went bit of the tracks but im ready for another one lol as im a grown up now i can actually do things as planed lol.  so i picked this as my challenge guide
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seems pretty straight forward so lets get going and make today day number 1.
the person you like and why you like them

hmmm lets see not sure how its ment is its someone i like in a romantic way or as a friend or as just someone out there?  i gona go with someone i like as a person i look up to as done plenty about the person i like well love romantickly so tecnickly cant say i like him  . so person that i like is good old dali. yeah i know hes dead but his spirit and art lives on and honestly guy have been a major major inspiration in my life and he is like  a person i want to be 1 day.  i know i would never be as crazy but then again.  why not. even at moment started reading one of his books my boyfriend got for me its not like a biografy but bit different perspective from this guy who sudnly is trading art etc.  its  called dali & i  by stan lauryssens.  its a briliant book and you should have look out for it 🙂 .
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30 day random blog challenge day 5 : 5 places that you would like to visit

For day 5 of the challenge I need list 5 places I’d like to visit

1. London. Well I can never get enough of london its my all time favorite place and dream place to be.

2. New york city. Well never been there but I feel that it be a magical trip for me and I’d nt want return lol

3. Las vegas. Its weird thing with this cos I thought if I ever get married that be the way I’d go to do so

4. Usa in general. I wud always wanted go to usa just go all over it see the places live lot .

5. Japan. There is so many things about japan that just amazes me that its def 1 of the to go places

As u can see I aint a country gal lol bigs city life is the 1 for me and I love It its like dream come true 🙂

its like i make up for looking bad yestrday ??

Ever felt like u question ur self? I know I do . Specialy about way I look. Say like yestrday and today I’m literary having 2 worst looks in long time . so it kind made me look back and think about it and its always this thing I do say I feel like I look down the hill today I kind will try make up for it tomarrow and try extra hard to look better. Is that weird? A bit lol but then again I feel like I have to make up to my self to look better like I let my self down if I dnt feel like I look nice in my own eyes . Specialy now that back in uni and want look nice going there . Lol but my tired look is so nt doing it . So I thought I share this disturbing pic of my self when I was in latvia this summer looking like a tramp .lol the best way to go haha

Being a goth for quite a wile now I know how it is to have a pressure to be normal and “fit in” even by the people who always suport u in it they still from time to time sugests to be some1 well normal. I dnt know how it is for other specific style people but to me specialy now when I have to wear uniform to work etc I feel under constant treath of losing my self and the style that I beyondly love and the 1 thing that’s truly mine. And must say its realy realy hard to keep going but I think that people should enjoy standing out and just being them selfs and simply showing that they are more than normal .