ok, this feels like the longest day ever . been up from like 10 o’clock which i thought that’s good can get up and take on. you know bit of smart thinking forward. so being a good child and being a good partner i thought ill do my weekly house clean. i was too dead after training yesterday so i moved it to today , usually its my Saturday thing. honestly i feel sweaty and dusty and just yuck but hey at least the house looks clean . some sense feels like i could have spent this day doing something else cos now i just wana sit i my bed watch a random show and play family guy game. feel kind of sad. despite obvious wanting show my future husband that ill be a good homemaker i could not do this on every day basis cos ill simply lose my mind. even now feels like spending too much time at home so i dnt now if i could do it as stay at home mum etc . no freaking way lol i know lots people want that but i just cant imagine myself in that position. just cant, plus all the other responsibilities of a house wife , im thinking ill have a househusband and ill be the bread bringer no objection to that ..
day 25 : your biggest regret
hmm besides couple really personal things that i dont really want to disclose dnt feel i regret much of my life. maybe i should have done more like with school. like little regret that i didnt try enough and maybe have been started to become a somebody by now. but dunno tbh. i always try to do things so i wouldnt regret them latter. feel like im a bit young to have major major regrets about something. maybe thats y i dont feel i do have it like that. honestly dont know.
day 16 : thoughts on education
well as any normal person in university i fill say im all for it . i think a person should always study something specially if you enjoy the subject what ever it is but i dont think the person have to study in uni if they dont feel that it is for them . its 21st century you can study online or do one of them wicked mini courses or even just study your self but like say i think its kind of persons own choice like do u need it or even more do u even want to do it. as for me i love going to uni now i hate the structure of the course maybe in some other uni it be better but thats different subject. i enjoy it for the most part . at least at the moment lol. and im just looking where it takes me in future.
just be tottal ramblings in this post.lol i nt been posting past couple days as just cant get my mind together everything seem to kind distract me in a sense. with uni and my bf being stressed to fuck and my mum the same so its jut yuck cos obvious noone wants to see people you love be unhappy.but u know life is life and cant do anything about it. at least there is some good things happening too. as uni be done im keeping fingers crossed for getting job i cant wait tbh i need money and kind need something to keep my mind bussy too need sort some bits about my screen printing to as i want to kind of start printing t shirts and stuff . ill keep you updated about that too so something to look out for. but for now i finaly just wana get under covers and sleep as have early training tomarrow and still like million things to do tomarrow so yeah
so as per any usual day at home i started with some youtube catch up and i recently subscribed to this random goth chick that as per usual as everyone else talks about things and one of her videos she posted recent was about gothic subculture. it literary makes me laugh that according to her perception anyone who doesnt listen to gothic rock is not goth and if they dont and still call them self’s goth then they are almost an error and failed part to the subculture so im like listening to this in pure tears from laughter lol i thought goths ment be pretty open minded lol. i dnt feel any less goth because she said all her saying its just makes me think wtf lol why would one even think these things so obvious me wanting to express my side . i thought i will do a small video about elitism and babybats and all that kind good stuff lol just share my thoughts on it too just cos i simply could. just sometimes i watch these videos and i just dont get why would one do this kind thing. its good to do like ones views on subculture as it is helpfull for people who just gets into it but like keep it that its just your thoughts not that everyone think that to me just instantly shows that person is bit too close minded that they can not imagen that there can be like 10000000000000.. exceptions to anything.
so im just thinking about working more on the videos for my youtube channel just mix it up a bit . would nail videos be interesting . do people still do their own nails? lol im a student i cant aford to go get my nails done so always come up with random things my self i thought that be kind fun. i gues plus be something i do every day anyway so why not . u know some sponge action lol and have this new nail stuff in birch box too . i dnt know im like looking at other peoples vids thinking thats cool i cant clearly do that lol like now instead just going and doing im making a blog about it instead lol . failing as per usual.
Always thought that when I will turn 21 ill hAve bit different life than I have now. Just thought I’d atleast go usa for my bday but things never seem to turn out how one plans it. At least the new years is just around corner too and for some reason I feel that it will def be a good year and I will hav lots great time and at least find job lol so I can do things . In main areas I just want move in with my bf and travel somewhere new . Just seems so much to do but so little time but like say new year have to be a good year x